Posted: May 28, 2010 in Conspiracies, LXD

A vast, superhuman dance-based conspiracy revealed itself to hundreds of people at prom, an event I elected to attend alone so I could bring you the high caliber reporting you’ve become accustomed to.

Here’s what we know:

Trevor Drift, who hasn’t attended a single dance this year, suddenly shows up in a vintage suit and sets fire to the dance floor, metaphorically speaking. That’s when things got weird. A sinister cat whose name I’ve been unable to track down, barged in to watch Trevor dance. Suddenly, this mystery villain was joined—perhaps intercepted by—three government agents, probably assigned to an ultra-secret dance division within the CIA.

The trio joined Trevor on the dance floor and proceeded to let loose a wave of superhuman moves never seen before.

Before our principal could get to the bottom of the spectacle, the government agents escorted—kidnapped?—Trevor, escaping out of the back of the gym and vanishing into the dark night. As for the mystery man, well, that’s another piece of the puzzle I’ll have to solve. But before the night was through, I did pry some juicy info from Alice Wondershaw, who told me this about Trevor: “He’s an extraordinary dancer.” But Trevor’s chief rival for Alice’s affection, Brendan Broman wasn’t so sure those moves Trevor thrashed him with were regulation.

“He’s a freak of nature, like a lab experiment set loose on the dance floor,” Broman said.

If Drift really is part of some sort of government dance experiment, perhaps those agents were sent to return him to the lab. And this part is pure speculation, dear readers, but perhaps that mystery man was a foreign operative, sent here to steal U.S. dance secrets.

The answer to all of these questions is with Trevor, and as soon as I find him I’ll find the truth and bring it you on

  1. Jacob K. says:

    Good reporting Cole. keep it up and let the truth be heard

  2. Elspeth says:

    Oh man! You miss one dance and you miss everything…

    I always suspected that there was a secret government cache of extraordinary dancers. I mean, basically there haven’t been any famous dancers since the 80s, where did they all go? Did people stop dancing? No. The government took them. It was the only explanation.

  3. t-bone malone says:

    Cole, You are about to tap into something bigger than even Savion Glover. Check then name Ren McCormick. He too went missing, way back in 1984. I’ve got a feeling he and a fellow by the name of Alan Moore somehow are involved too. Moore has been involved with other extraordinary leagues and as for Ren, well some say he went to the wrong side of the tracks. In any case my research has continued to hit dead ends. I’m headed to Korea next week, might be chasing shoe strings, but this is much much bigger than just “the government”. It’s global, possibly even bigger. I won’t contact you again, to risky, but I’ll be monitoring your site.

  4. bryanflurry says:

    Hey Cole, so Trevor hasn’t attended a single dance until the prom. Why only now? What’s stopping him before? What do you think? I hope you’re reading the comments.

  5. Rachel says:


    Did you notice at the dance how weird the DJ was acting? Maybe check in on his background. I smell something fishy going on. oh and if its the government I hope you are ok, reporting on this stuff can get you in hot water.

  6. Deborah says:

    I hope Trevor’s OK. he’s a really nice guy and I was happy to see that he made it to prom. Hopefully he didn’t get caught up in all this crazy LXD stuff that happens around town.

    More importantly, where are you Cole??? I’m starting to wonder if you’re even helping uncover the truth or help hide it. hmmm

  7. Benjamin says:

    Man I hope we’ll get to see Trevor soon! He really started things up with a bang!

  8. Lincoln says:

    If I were you I would keep my nose out of government issues. Why are you worried about the LXD? For all you know (if they really exist) they’re trying to help.

  9. Chris says:

    trevor drift was recruited to the lxd… duh! did u see the first episode?!

  10. nate gray says:

    hey me again.remember hulu has footage of LXD.

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