Foreign Exchange Fiasco!

Posted: April 30, 2010 in Conspiracies

The school’s administration denies it, the faculty are pleading ignorance, and U.S. government officials have refused to comment, but there’s growing evidence that what’s been sold to students as a harmless—some say “educational”—foreign exchange program, is in fact a nefarious organ trafficking operation that spans the globe.

Proof? Consider this troubling tale from sophomore Ed Babington, who spent last semester with a host family in Japan. Babington came back with some snappy pictures from Disneyland Tokyo and an affinity for sushi. But he was missing something—his tonsils.

What happened to Babington’s tonsils remains unclear. But this much is certain: soon after Babington complained of a sore throat, his host family took him to a local doctor, who administered a heavy narcotic that rendered the sophomore unconscious—and ripe for organ harvesting.


Just like that Babington had become another victim of a vast international conspiracy of organ traffickers masquerading as educators. His tonsils were snatched from him, sold into a black market where organs are traded like hubcaps or car stereos.

How big is this conspiracy? How deep does it go? Only the cabal that hatched this dastardly plan can say for sure. But as of now that cabal is on notice—the fourth estate is coming for them in the person of the muckraking Cole Waters reporting for

  1. Elspeth says:

    I’m not upset about the organ trafficking, what upsets me is that he didn’t get to reap any rewards from it. I know from personal experience that tonsils can be considered a delicacy. Which means that he could have made a pretty penny, but they stole it without any offer of compensation. In fact, he probably had to pay for that! Rude.

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